Couples Advice

Finally made it to a year (or some other important marker) in a relationship with someone special? Not just any old date idea will suffice to mark this special occasion forever. How do you celebrate in a way that you’ll both remember for years to come?

Denis from Madison, WI writes:
“I’ve been dating my girlfriend for almost a year now. I’m in high school and this is the first relationship I’ve had that’s made it that long. I’m really thrilled to still be with her, and I hope that this relationship will make it many more years. How do I plan something really special which will show her how happy I am that she’s been in my life for the past year, and maybe hints at my hopes for the future? Thanks.”

Hi Denis. Congratulations on making it to the one year mark! That’s a great accomplishment, especially in high school. I’m glad you’re working hard to plan something extra special to mark the occasion.

In terms of plans, I think there are two great approaches to this. One is to do something you both already love doing together and which has meant a lot to you, only to jazz it up a bit. The other would be to do something which you’ve always wanted to do together but have never gotten around to, perhaps because it’s a little extra special or time consuming or entails travel.

For example, if you like doing dinner and a movie night out, then maybe you could do that, but make it extra special. Try going to a unique local cinema you’ve never been to before, and follow up with a special dinner at a romantic restaurant for example. If you like doing outdoor activities, maybe plan to do something outdoors which is a little out of your usual range. Drive a little farther to go on a more dramatic hike, charter a fishing boat, etc.

The other approach is to do something you’ve never gotten around to before. Is there a big sporting event you’d both enjoy that you normally wouldn’t be able to afford? Is there a band in town which is special to you both and which you normally wouldn’t be able to make the time for? Getting tickets for a special one-time event can show how much you care and also let you experience something special together. And of course, following up with a nice dinner somewhere is a great idea too. Or you could try cooking a special dinner, maybe something she’s always wanted but that takes some extra time and effort for you to make.

Planning a dating anniversary takes time and thought, and the trick is to make sure that the time and thought show. Your anniversary should be something which will be special for your girlfriend, but also special for you. Your dating anniversary celebrates the unique connection which you share, and should incorporate shared activities which have brought you closer in the past and will bring you closer in the future. In that sense what you’re trying to do is to unite the everyday with the extraordinary—which is what relationships are all about.